River's Doctor
by breezie531
Summary: River finds out that Clara kissed her Doctor and she get's a little well..heated.


**A/N- Hey ALL! I know i've been missing for FOREVER! but I had good reason. I was without a laptop for about 2 years. I borrowed my mothers laptop and my sisters computer but neither of them had any kind of word processors beyond notepad. BUT the good news is, is that I do have some updates outlined in notebooks which I am working on getting onto my computer so that I can update some of my other stories most of you probably thought I abandoned butttt I didn't. I lost a bunch of my old work when my other laptop broke and I had some other updates and such there so it's a work in progress but there is more work coming your way. I just wrote this because it popped into my head while I was talking to a friend of mine Emily who is freaking awesome and yea. Anyway, the kiss in the Christmas special annoyed me and made me want to punch Clara and smack the Doctor because I love River Song. anyway here ya go! Reviews would be wonderful!**

River Song woke up this morning determined to see her husband. It had been a long week, there were 2 new guards at the prison and had done nothing but gotten on her last nerve every chance they got. So with the help of some hallucinogenic lipstick, one vortex manipulator, and armed with her trusty diary she was now standing outside the doors of her trusty Tardis anxiously awaiting the smile that would appear on her husband's face at her presence. She took a deep breath and opened the doors putting as much sway in her hips as River Song-ly possible.

As the doors opened she could see her doctor standing beside the console arguing quite loudly with a short annoyingly cute brunette. Even though she had missed the first half of the argument she could tell he was riled up. He was that cute shade of pinkish red only she was supposed to be able to make him, and his arms were waving wildly. She could feel her fingers of her right hand twitch involuntarily instinctively wanting to reach for her gun, but she did not. She would give the doctor the benefit of the doubt, and she was sure he would not take a dead companion well, at least not if she could not come up with a better reason than "I shot her because she made you blush." As she contemplated the argument went on.

"Clara listen it was once… it will never happen again. If River ever found out…" The doctor wrung his hands with a mixture of worry, anxiety and possibly fear.

"I don't care what you say doctor you kissed me back." Clara pointed with a accusing and teasing tone.

The doctor threw up his hands and began to pace. He pointed back toward Clara.

"I did not I was surprised but I did none of the kissing back of the humany kind. I am a time lord I am not attracted to you weak humany type people with such short live spans. I mean look at you you're what twenty something? I am over nine HUNDRED years old. I've had shoes older than you!"

At this River strode toward the console. This was the last straw. She pulled out her gun, pointing directly at this human who was called Clara. She must be her doctor's new companion. Well she better have enjoyed the time she had with the Doctor because it was about to come to an abrupt end. River stopped just feet from her. She looked between the Doctor and Clara. She stared Clara directly in the eyes, the Doctors face went from a mix of panic and aggravation to absolute fear and pure panic.

"Oh river hello! I didn't see you there. This is Clara she's the new companion, met her while I was parked on a cloud. Clara Oswin Oswald this is my wife River Song."

"Your _WIFE?!" _Clara's face showed only horror.

The icy mask River wore did not waver.

"_Run"_ River said in an even steady voice.

Clara looked from the doctor to River expecting someone to tell her this was a joke. The doctor shook her head and pointed at the gun.

"She's not kidding, you should run."

River took another step toward Clara now only inches from her face.

"_Run."_

Clara let out a high pitched squeak, before she spun on her heel and ran for her life, almost running face first into the wall of the Tardis before turning down one of the many hallways, and passages.

River holstered her gun and turned toward the Doctor who now looked as if he might wet himself at any moment.

"River…River please," He threw his hands up and backed away from her slowly "let me explain… it's not what you think… well it's probably close to what you think but it's not… well.."

River grabbed his shoulders and pulled him to her their lips meeting in a firey kiss. The Doctor as always had no idea what to do with his hands let them wave wildly for a moment before settling them on her waist.

River pulled back, the Doctor caught still leaning forward into her looking pathetically sad that River's lips were no longer on his wore an adorable little pout. River pulled back her hand it collided hard with the side of the Doctors face with a loud SMACK.

His pout morphing into the face that she now came to name his "slap face".

"WHAT WAS THAT FOR?! You kiss me and then slap me?!" He rubbed the side of his face before River snatched back his hand replacing it on her waist. She took his face in her hands.

"Doctor dear, we've talked about this. No more kissing the companions. I might actually shoot her next time."

The Doctor just had time to give her the smallest nod before River backed him against the console to continue claiming his lips as her own. She wanted there to be no doubt in that _Clara's _that the Doctor was hers.

An unmeasurable time later Clara found her way back to the console room only to find the Doctor and his wife River Song snogging on the console. River was sitting on the console itself her legs wrapped around the Doctors powerful hips. River's lightning fast reflexes had her gun once again pointed directly in Clara's face, and the young girl had no doubt of her aim. She turned once again, vowing to let the Doctor come find _her_ when River was ready to _not _shoot her on sight.


End file.
